TheFranciscos.Net

I feel so old.

The other day, I was listening to what has become my afternoon drivetime ritual – All Things Considered on National Public Radio and realized that I was listening to the news – and actually cared about it. I remember back in high school when my dad would pick me up from school and he would always be listening to the news somewhere on the AM band. This always drove me nuts because I’d rather be listening to Depeche Mode or New Order, but my dad had to have his afternoon news fix, so he always won. Now, it’s myself that I find listening to the news in the afternoon. Granted I still listen to my 80s music (and I have the kick-ass mp3 system with dual subwoofers to prove it), but I always find myself listening to the news in the afternoon.

Is it because I’m more mature? I doubt it since I still listen to Howard Stern in the mornings, and there are tons of people will argue that that is the most immature radio show on earth. Is it because I find myself caring more about things going on in the country, and the world in general? Yes, I think so, but more for selfish personal reasons. I think it has something to do with wanting to know what kind of world my daughter is going to grow up in. It may sound corny, but with the news I listen to, I find myself asking if and how that affects Zoe, Aileen, and myself.

I feel that I’m at a crossroads right now between becoming a mature adult and an adult trying to hold on to his last juvenile tendencies. Don’t get me wrong – I think I’m always going to have childish tendencies, but at the same time, I need to be somehow more responsible for people in my life.

I guess this is just what it feels like when you’re about to turn 30.